This Day

Today is the day, I have been thinking about today for most of the month.  Why today you ask?  Well today is the last day of the month.  Let me back up.  At the beginning of the month I made a goal to past every day about something that I am grateful for.  Other then that one day I forgot I have made good on my goal.  But I had no idea how hard it would be.  Not that there are not plenty of things to be grateful for, I have just been finding it hard to find post worthy subjects.  Every day things happen that I am grateful for, but some of then you don't want to hear about.  This morning at 4 am Glen woke my up to go to the bathroom and stayed dry all night.  I am grateful that he is doing so well, but do you all really want to hear about it in detail?  You see my dilemma.  SO today, silly as it may be, I am grateful that I have reached me goal and it is over.  I have been forced to think in depth about the blessing I have and for that I am also grateful, but I cannot remember the last time I was so happy to see the last day of November.
Here is another list of things I am grateful for.
Our pet grasshoppers, (Macky and Tacky Hopper) they are getting on my nerves and honestly I kind of hope they die soon, but they are hanging in there and my kids love them.  I love them because my kids do.
I am grateful that my boys are such good friends, I am grateful Glen loves horses so much and Benjamin loves trains and trucks.  Though Glen does seem to be succeeding in converting him to the ways of cowboys.
I am grateful for my friends idea to rotate toys so that when my kids get sick of the ones I have out then I can trade and it's like having new toys again.
I am grateful for they toy Nativity set my husbands friend gave us.  It's  Precious Moments set and my kids love it as much as I do.  It helps me teach them the story of Jesus' birth.
I am grateful for the scriptures, I should have posted about this one.  Within the scriptures I find so much peace and so many answers.  I love the scriptures.  I love the Bible and the Book of Mormon.  I know that the Bible testifies of Christ and that the Book of Mormon is another Testament of Christ.
I am grateful for a camera to catch pictures and videos of my kids on.
I am grateful for my Testimony.
I am grateful for trees, mountains, flowers, parks, water, sprinklers, grass...the list is endless, really it is.
My life is so full of blessings.  In the scriptures it talks about the blessing of Heaven being poured out so that there is not even room to receive them.  I feel like this often.  I feel like my life is so full of blessing and they just keep coming.  I thank the Lord every day for blessing me so much.

Magic and wonder

Today I am grateful for the magic and wonder that children see everywhere.  Today I set up the Christmas tree.  The boys had been asking for days, but I just didn't know where to put it.  If it weren't for them we may not have set one up...but then again if it weren't for them I would have tons more room. :)  Anyway...every now and then I can see the world through their eyes.  I saw it today as I set up the tree with all the lights, pretty ornaments, my other Christmas decorations and we talked about baby Jesus and read Luke chapter 2.  There came into their eyes a light that spoke to me.  It spoke of wonder and magic.  So often as adults life becomes so mundane.  Through the eyes of my children I have again found the magic and wonder in Christmas lights, the story of baby Jesus, leaves changing color, clouds, hugs and kisses, wrapping paper and boxes, bugs, slides and trampolines.  To a child discovering the world for the first time everything holds magic and wonder.  I am grateful for the opportunity that I have as a mother to re-discover the world through my children's eyes.

Home

I am grateful for a home.  Our house is warm, it is pretty big for the amount of rent we pay, it's just what we need.  I know that I will never be asked to leave, or forced out.  I can count on it always being warm.  I know that it will keep us dry in the rain, warm in the winter, cool in the summer and always be a place we can return to.  I am also grateful for the idea of home.  I know that when I am upset something inside me wants nothing more then to go home. Home is comfort, love, safety, and family.  Home really is where your heart is and my heart(s) are here.

Forgivness

Today I am grateful for forgiveness, and the Atonement.  Today in Relief Society we talked about the Atonement.   I am also grateful for my knowledge of the Atonement.  I know that Christ atoned for my sins, but do you know what is really special?  I know that He also suffered and atoned for so much more.  He suffered for my heartaches, me fears, my confusion, loneliness, worries, and tears.  Jesus Christ did not just atone for our sins, I know that he atoned for all.  Because He suffered for all he can also comfort all, heal all, guide all, and He knows so intimately how we feel.  He loves us so much and He will give comfort, strength, guidance, and forgiveness.

Sisters

I am thankful for sisters.  Growing up I had one sister, then I got married and inherited five more sisters, and then my mom got married and now I have three more.  K, give me a sec to do the math 1 2 3...I have 9 sisters! (I don't believe in in laws or 1/2 or anything like that, we are family.)  Then I have the girls that I have adopted as sisters, and every one is Relief Society.  I love sisters. 

Sisters give you something you just can't get from a brother, I have a lot of brothers too, so I know.  If I want to rough and tumble, laugh at stupid stuff, or start a hitting contest I go to my brothers.  But with sisters you get good times, laughs, companionship, comfort, shopping excursions, sympathy, and so much more.  I really look forward to my sister coming up from the southern part of the state where she lives,  one sister lives in another state, I have sisters all over and I love to get together with them.

So to all of my sisters, wherever you are, I love you and I am so grateful for you.  You have helped me to become who I am and I love you all so much!

The priesthood

I am grateful for the Priesthood.  The priesthood is the power of God on Earth.  In old testament times when Christ walked the Earth and called apostles He ordained with with power and authority.  This same power and authority that existed in the early Church of Christ has been restored to the Earth in these latter days.  Through the power and Authority of God men ordained to the priesthood can bless and heal the sick, cast out devils, give blessings, and speak by the power and authority of God.  I do not know all of the powers and key that men can hold, but I  know that the priesthood has blessed my life immensely.  I am so grateful to see this power in my life.  I know that I am so blessed to have the priesthood in my home and to share in the blessing that my husband does.

Potty Training

Ask me 6 months ago how I feel about potty training and I may have cried, screamed, or taken on a look of sheer terror. But today I can say that i am thankful for potty training.  i have tried so many times with Glen I was ready to give up until he was 16, but after praying about it, again, I felt like I should give it another go.  It was time.  After the first night I was ready to give up again, he just wasn't having any of it.  But I knew the time was right and I muddled through.  Monday morning he pooped twice on his own and after my huge celebratory dance he decided he was potty trained.  Since then it has been pretty easy.  My Glen is so stubborn some times he makes his daddy look easy going.  These Hansens have some serious stubbornness going on.  But Now that Glen has decided he is potty trained he is doing it just fine.  He has know how for almost a year, but he just wouldn't.  You cannot force a child in anything, control is an illusion.  I taught him what to do and how to do it and then needed to wait for him to decide that he was ready.
Today, after a nearly perfect day with him in underwear I can say that I am grateful for potty training.  I do not miss changing his diapers in the LEAST!  Now if only I can get Benjamin to be potty trained too I can kiss diapers good bye for a while.  Unfortunately I do not think Benjamin is ready at all yet so i an stuck with diapers, but Glen, oh Glen.  He may not have it perfect yet, but by his attitude i know he is not going to dig in his heels and quite like he has done every other time, and this mean that with work we will succeed and his in not going back to diapers.  Celebrate!  Thank goodness for potty training.

Insperation

This picture really has nothing to do with inspiration, unless you count the fact that my two sisters in law and I all dressed our boys up in jean overalls without any prior communication, but it's a cute picture.
Last night-this morning actually- Glen came in and asked to cuddle with me.  usually when he wakes up in the middle of the night he knocks on our door until I come to take him back to bed.  But this time he snuck in, put his hand on my shoulder and whispered that he wanted to cuddle.  How could I refuse? It means I woke up with a really sore neck, but it was worth it.  At some point I woke up to take him back to bed but the thought entered my head that he needed to stay and cuddle with me this time.  I have no idea why he needed me, but i am grateful for the inspiration to let him stay.
Many times in my life I have been inspired to do one thing or another.  Take a meal to someone who I later found out had a really sick child and single working mom, take Glen to the Dr because he had an ear infection, stay up late to wait for John to get home so he could tell me about his hard day, go visit a friend or call my sister.  I know that I have also been the recipient of other's inspiration.  One that really stands out to me is right after I met John.  I had just gotten my mission call and I did not think it would come.  John and I were already planning on getting married and I was so confused and it really hit me hard.  Right after I hung up with John, who i had been talking to at the time, my sister called to see what was wrong.  She lived in Cedar and called me less then a minute after I started feeling distressed.  She really helped me and I know she was inspired to call me.
I believe in continuing revelation and personal revelation.  That means God speaks to me.  I can ask him in prayer and receive answers.  I can also receive warnings, be told something is wrong, know that someone needs help, and be inspired in all things.  Call it a mother's intuition, call it a gut feeling, a hunch, or whatever you will.  I know that God speaks to us, communicates with our minds and hearts and that His Holy Spirit will giude us.  I am very grateful for this knowledge.

Books

I am grateful for books.  I love books.  I think my soul is written in words.  Some people have a soul made of music, or art, or maybe car engines?  But my soul is written in words.  I have such a passion for words and books.  A good book does more then tell a story, it conveys emotion, teaches, inspires, makes you think, a good book can transport you to another world.
One of my very favorite books is 3rd Nephi in the book of Mormon.  It tells of the ministry of Christ in the Americas.  I love it because it is a story full of love. When He teaches the people, He prays with them, weeps with them, heals them, and blesses the little children.  They came to Him one by one, that tells me He knew them each by name and loved them.
Another book that I really love is "Little Women" by Luisa My Alcott.  I love this book because it it so real to me.  The characters seem to be real people with real problems and real heart aches.  And yet the book is so full of goodness, the characters want to be good and they work so hard to become so.  I love that the struggle to become good doe not happen over night, it takes time and a lot of hard work.  They make mistakes and they learn.  I love Jo.  If I had to choose a literary character to represent me it would be Jo.  I can relate to her in so many ways.  He love of books and words, her love of "Boyish play" her vanity about her hair, her dislike of dressing up and being formal, her love of boys and desire to open a boys home, and her anger.  Anger was her bosom enemy and it is mine as well.  I love reading of Jo's struggle to bridle her anger and her journey to save boys.
I love to lose myself in a good fantasy like "Fable Haven"  Or laugh at a funny series like "Alcatraz vs. the Evil Librarians."  I read a book and I become what I read, I laugh with the characters, I cried when Beth and Charlie died, I even cried when Mary died.  I am on the edge of my seat when Seth and Kendra battle demons and dragons.  I get an eerie feeling when Meg and Charles Wallace go through the tesseract to the town where everything is the same.  I learn right along the apostles as I hear the teaching of Jesus.  I get to touch his hands and feet and see the angels ministering to the children in America.  And I am filled with love when I read about Richard learning what the first gift of Christmas is.
Books- words, learning, laughing, crying, thrills, love.  I am very grateful for books.

Daughter of God

Last night I was thinking about the Time Out for Women I went to over the weekend.  It was simply amazing.  One of my favorite things about women in the church is that when you get a group of women together it is always uplifting and inspiring.  There was so much that I learned and I went away feeling the desire to be a better mother, wife, and woman.  It was simply amazing.  I cannot even describe it.
As a mother I do feel a little burned out sometimes, especially near the end of a semester.  I feel frustrated and impatient at times.  I have struggles as a wife.  When we argue or I feel like things are not going as they aught to.  Sometimes I even dislike being a woman.
Yet those times are few and far between compared to the love I have of womanhood and all that is a part of womanhood.  I know that as a woman I have a special role to play.  As a mother, wife and woman my role is divine.
When I was in high school I reached a time in my life when I felt that to progress in my life I needed to know who I am.  I felt such a deep desire and need to know.  For weeks I thought about it, I studied it out in my mind.  I had to know.  I thought of many things that describe me.  My name, love of books and words, I was a student.  But all of the titles I came up with fell short, they were what I was, but not who I was.  I needed to know.  I knew that I would receive an answer if I preyed about it, so I did.  I told my Father that I was really struggling with this question.  I needed to know who I was.  Then a thought entered into my mind with such force, and yet such tender love that I have no words for it.  The words were "You know who you are, you are mine."  My heart swelled and my mind filled with light.  I did know, I knew that I was a daughter of God.  Then I saw an image, of my Father and I felt almost like He was hugging me.
Since that day I have never questioned who I am or what my purpose in life is.  I feel that I have escaped a lot of struggles because hard as it may be to be a mother, wife, and woman, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that it is right, and good, and it is my role to play.  I know that God loves me, and as my loving Father he will not leave me.  He will lead me, lift me, strengthen me, test me, comfort me, and be there always.
I am a woman, I am a wife, I am a mother, but first and foremost I am a daughter of God and nothing can change or take it away from me ever!  This knowledge has saved me and for it I am eternally grateful.

Priorities

I am grateful for my priorities and knowing what order they are in.  Incidently sleep, not mine, my husbands, comes before blogging hence the skip yesterday.  You I know you all still love me anyway.  And tonight is super lame because i want to talk about Time out For women, but I wan to do it justice.  So just remember some things are more important them others.
My priorities (Some of them)
God
Kids
Husband
Serving Others
Myself.

Angels

Today I am grateful for angels.  Yes, I very much believe in angels.  I would go so far as to say that I know for a fact that angels are real.  I know that God sends angels to protect, guide, comfort, and help us.
I have seen angels in my life, I have felt their influence.  I will not go into it too much because it is very sacred to me, but I do not think I would be here today if it were not for angels.
I know that one of the blessings of attending the temple is that angels will be sent to guide protect my children.  In a big scary world such as we live in I am grateful for that blessing.  I want to know that my children are watched over.  I want to know that I am watched over.
Thank you to my angels, seen and unseen.  Often times heaven works through the people in our lives and they too are angels.

Music

Today I am grateful for music.  I love music.  Music can do so much for my mood, inspire me, make me laugh, make me think, make me want to dance.  I love dancing with my kids to the music that play along with the credits after movies.  It has become somewhat of a tradition.  When  a movie ends my kids hop up and say lets dance.  I sing hymns and primary songs when I am angry, upset, scared, or sad.  I always feel better afterwards.  I just love music.

Laughing

Today I am grateful for a sense of humor and laughter.   John says I am  immature, but I like to think I have a good sense of humor.  :)  To me life is kind of a mix between a game, an adventure, and a joke. Don't get me wrong, I can be serious when it's needed...usually.  :) But I dearly love to laugh.  Life is so full of...life is just full.  There are all sorts of ups and downs, disappointments, frustrations, messes, chaos, and all sorts of stuff.  If I did not spend so much time laughing I would probably spend it crying.  I prefer cheeky to teary.
For me attitude is everything.  Instead of getting upset with Glen for getting into my make up and nail polish I laughed at him, took pictures and had all sorts of fun with it before having him help me clean it up.
Instead of feeling irritated that Benjamin had frosting all over his face, the table, chairs, and even some on the wall (how did * that* happen)  I took pictures of his cute funny faces and we laughed at his "old man beard."
Some people call me silly and tell me to be serious, but why?  What is the point?  Why go through life feeling embarrassed, frustrated, irritated, or sad when you can find something (or someone =D ) to laugh at.  :)  Life is so full of little moments that we can laugh at and I laugh at myself as often as I laugh at other things.  Te other day I made a really blond comment and instead of feeling embarrassed I re told the story 2-3 times and laughed at it. Today someone asked me how I was and I said "Great!"  Then proceeded to trip on the stairs and I laughed and my grace, or lack of it.
So here's the moral guys and gals, if you can't laugh at your self...well, just call me, I'll laugh at you.  :)

New babies

Today I am very grateful for new babies.  I love the hugs and cuddles I get from my sweet boys, but there is just something about a new baby that is so full of sweetness that it just fills me up.  Here is my newest nephew being fawned over by my boys who are almost as baby crazy as I am.  Glen kept talking about how tiny his feet are, and Benjamin wanted to hold him again and again.  I think that even they felt that there is something special about anew baby.
Maybe is is the newness of anew baby, maybe is is that they have come so recently from Heaven and Father's arms. I don't know what it is, but I know I love it immensely.  Oh my goodness, it was so hard to give this sweet thing back to his daddy, who by the way was so patient letting me hold him four times and didn't even look at me funny when I had a hard time giving him back.  And bay did I have a hard time.  I could have sat there all night holding, cuddling, feeling his soft hair, tiny toes and finger, and just loving him.
I am so grateful I had the opportunity to go down to welcome the newest member of our family.  I am grateful to have been able to hold him, to see my kids hold him, to touch him, feel him, and whisper sweet things in his ears, his tiny ears.  I am so grateful for new babies.

Being a mom

Today I am grateful to be a mam, and to be a stay at home mom.  Being a mom is hard. It's a lot of sacrifice, sleepless nights, hard work, constant attention, hard work, and then some more hard work.  It means having part of your heart walk around outside your body.  Being a mom means putting all of your needs and desires second to the little ones that need you for everything.  Being a mom means that it's now your job to teach this sweet baby everything from manners to walking, eating with a spoon, words, the list is endless really.  And it's the toughest job I have ever had, harder by far then teaching 20 five year olds for 4 hours a day, much harder then my desk job working with Deaf adults, and harder even then 12 hour shifts at a nursing home.

Oh boy is it hard, but so, so worth it.  I do not get paid in money, but I get some of the best hugs and kisses, some of the sweetest mommy moments, and some of the warmest cuddles.  I know that what I do is important, perhaps even the most important job in the world. I would not change it for a minute.  I would not change the stinky diapers, sick babies that are up all night, or even the tantrums for anything.  Because with all those comes "Your the best mommy in the world!"  "I wuve you" from a baby who can barley speak, and the look I see in their eyes. I don't know if I can describe it.  It's a look that says it all.  You are my hero.  I love you.  You are my world.  Thank you.  You are wonderful.  And when they look at me like that nothing else matters, nothing is as important as being as wonderful as they see me.

I am so grateful for all of the hugs, wet kisses, learning moments, pony rides on my back, games of hide-and-seek, walks, spur of the moment picnics, candle light dinners because the kids love candles, holding hands as they fall asleep, stories, songs, scribbles that become works of art, weeds that become more precious then roses, cuddles in the morning, talks at night, and so, so much more.  I am even grateful for the hard times, because it is from them I learn and because of them I appreciate the easy and fun times all the more.
Most of all i am grateful to be a mom because my sweet innocent children help me to want to be a better person, and because as a mom I get an incredible look at God's love.  Knowing how much I love my sweet boys helps me to see how truly deep and perfect Father in heaven's love is.  I love them so much, I would give my life for then without a second thought.  As deep and wonderful as my life is I know that Heavenly Father loves them and all of us even more because His love is perfect and unending.  I thank the Lord every day for the blessing of being a mother.

New days

Today I am grateful for new days.  At the end of each day I think back on my day and I try to see where I could have done better.  I pray and ask Heavenly Father to help me do and be better tomorrow.  Every day I try to be a better person then I was the day before.
I'm not big into watching the sunrise.  I love to see it and all, it's so beautiful, but honesty I love sleep more then beauty.  Don't hate me Elizabeth.  I do love to wake up earlier then my kids so that I can read scriptures without the distractions of every day life around here.  And there is just something about morning that feels so clean and fresh, new even.  When I get to wake up earlier then the kids I curl up on the couch, or sometimes sit at the kitchen table where I can look out the window and see the day.  For a few minutes I revel in the newness of everything and enjoy the quiet. Then I open my scriptures. Early morning is my favorite time to study the scriptures.  It's not just the quiet, I feel somehow closer to God in the newness of the day, almost like I am a new person and being clean I can be closer to Him then ever.
I suppose this is all connected to the atonement.  It is because of the atonement that I get to start each new day over again.  It is because of that sacrifice that I can make every day better then the last.  It is Christ's atoning sacrifice that allows me to be forgiven of my sins each night and start fresh, clean, and close to God. Some day I hope that I will have come far enough that the whole day has that new day feeling.  The "I am clean and close to God feeling."  Because of the atonement I have the hope that someday I will be clean and live in God's presence again.

Veteran's Day

Today I am grateful for freedom.  As it is Veteran's day I have been saving freedom for today.  I have so many freedoms and things that I am grateful for and I know that is is because of the men and women who fight for my freedoms that I have them.
Today I am thinking of Mormon and his title of Liberty  Alma 46:12 And it came to pass that he rent his coat; and he took a piece thereof, and wrote upon it—^aIn memory of our God, our religion, and freedom, and our peace, our wives, and our children—and he fastened it upon the end of a pole.

 13 And he fastened on his head-plate, and his^abreastplate, and his shields, and girded on his armor about his loins; and he took the pole, which had on the end thereof his rent coat, (and he called it the ^btitle of liberty) and he ^cbowed himself to the earth, and he prayed mightily unto his God for the blessings of liberty to rest upon his brethren, so long as there should a band of ^dChristians remain to possess the land-

I am also thinking of Brigham Young who was very patriotic and encouraged the early church members to be patriotic also.  I am proud to be an American and I know it is by the grace of God and the sacrifice of other that I live her so happy, safe and free.
We live in a great country, a country that was guided from the beginning by God, and has been protected from the beginning by those who knew that freedom does not come free.  Today I thank all those who have sacrificed, even unto the giving of their lives, so that I can be free to enjoy my family, life, worship God, and have so many privileges.  I thank you for working so hard and giving so much so that my children can be free and safe.  Thank you!

My husband

Tonight I am very grateful for my husband.  Is is so sweet and loving.  He is supportive and hard working.  He is patient, kind, and understanding.  He loves me and thinks I am beautiful.  He is encouraging, honest, sincere, and he is so very good to me.
I won't overkill this with words.  Sometimes I come across a feeling so deep and pure that I cannot put it into words.  That is how I feel about my love for John.  It's cheesy I know, but I like cheese, Marbled Colby/ Monteray Jack cheese to be exact.

Life

 I am grateful for my life.  I have so much to be grateful for in my life.  My children, my husband, my extended family, the gospel.  I am just happy to be alive.  I love to run, feel the wind, dance crazy with my kids and slow with my husband.  I like to smell flowers and watch thunderstorms.  There is so much.
But you know what I have really been thinking about today? The life before and after this one.  I have never struggled with questions about who I am, where I came from, or where I am going when I die.  I am grateful that it makes sense.  I know that before I was born I lived in Heaven with my Heavenly Father.  Then I came to Earth and got a body.  Then some day I will die and return to live with God again.  When some one close to me dies I am especially grateful for this knowledge.  I know that his life is not the end.  I know that we will be together again.  I am grateful because it is so sad to me to see someone who thinks that dying is the end, that after this life there is nothing.  If that were the case I would wonder what is the point in living.  If there is no reward or punishment after, is there is no life after death, then what is the point of this life?  But that is not the case.  I am living my life the best way I can and getting better every day because I know that if I am good and righteous some day I will live with my Father in Heaven again, and that in my greatest ambition.