We had all taken a trip tot he pool. On the way back my seat broke and I was leaned way back in the car and couldn't see the front of my long car so I ran into the wall that surrounds my neighbors yard. I busted a hole in it and I was super stressed. I got the kids out of the car, gathered up all of the swimming stuff in my arms and rushed inside with burning feet. I put everything away, got the boys occupied and called the insurance company, my neighbor, and found someone to fix the wall. I remember thinking at one time that it was oddly quiet and wondered where Elizabeth was. I had my arms full so I must have brought her in and since it was nap time that was why it was so quiet. I kept making phone calls. I'm not sure how long she was there, but thank heaven my friend's sister came to visit and noticed her in the car. Suddenly I was the worst parent. I didn't even deserve children. I didn't tell anyone. Only my neighbor and her sister, and my husband knew what happened. I was afraid my kids would be taken since I was so incompetent, I was afraid that people would judge me, I was ashamed so I tried to just forget it.
The week after Abigail was born I did it again. I went to church with Benjamin and new born baby Abigail and I went into church without her. I saw my reflection in the door and wondered why I had a huge diaper bag with me since Benjamin didn't need it and then I remembered. Twice it happened to me, twice heaven looked out for my babies. But it happened. It happens. It doesn't make me a bad mother. In fact, anyone who knows me knows how totally dedicated I am to my children. I am an excellent, attentive, involved mom, but still it happened to me.
It happens. It happened when I was distracted and stressed, when something was new and out of the ordinary. I don't judge those parents who forget. They are not bad parents. That made a mistake, one I guarantee they will never forget whether their child was harmed or not. My heart breaks for them. They have enough weighing no their mind and heart without hurtful comments from strangers. Next time I will do more then refuse to be unkind, I will offer a kind word and i hope you do too.
