Home is where your heart is

Home is where your heart is

Monday, May 30, 2016

Adventures in the mountains


    Saturday afternoon we headed into the mountains for a nice hike.  It was a little longer then I thought, but it was  fun all the same.  Once we reached the end of the hike we stopped to eat a picnic dinner before heading back down the trail.  It was beautiful.  There was as stream to play in, but it was so cold since it was melted snow, a waterfall, and plenty of big rocks to climb on.  After we all finished eating we all got our socks and shoes back on and the boys headed off for one last escapade before we left.  I got Abigail in a hiking backpack and on John's back and headed down the little trail next to the stream to find the boys.  They were gone.  Totally gone.  I walked pretty far down the trail calling their names and my friend went another way.  They were no where to be found!  First I was irritated, I had talked to them about staying close.  Then I was worried.  After about 1/2 an hour I started feeling scared.  John had gone down the trail to look for them and my friend went on a side trail.  We met back up.  Still no boys.  My friend and I went up the trail to see if the boys had headed back ahead of us, while John stayed to look more.  I had Abigail on my back and tried to hurry as fast as I could.  I held Elizabeth in my arms as much as I could to hurry it. I kept telling myself they were at the car, I just had to get there.  About half way down the trail John caught up with me, he hadn't found the boys.  The car, they HAD to be at the car.  We were all praying, had been the whole time, and it was that peace that kept me from totally losing it and becoming hysterical.  We got to the car and they weren't there.  That means they were back up at the waterfall.  Lost.  Wet.  Cold.  It was nearly 9:00 and getting dark.  John and I had planned to call search and rescue if they were not at the car, but my friend beat us to it, she had already called.  Then she got a call.  4 teen aged hikers had found both boys, they were ok and the hikers would bring them down.  Search plaens had begun flying search patterns by then. I wasn't willing to wait so I left John with our girls and ran back up the trail.  I was till in a bit of a panic, I had to see them be know they were safe.  I ran nearly two miles up the mountain before I found them.   I hugged them both, in tears.  I thanked the four who found them and we started back.  Benjamin was tired and sore so I carried him for a little while, then one of the guys who found them offered to carry Benjamin since I was clearly tired. We were almost to the cars when three search and rescue volunteers met us.  They insisted we stop to rest so they could make sure Glen and Benjamin were safe.  One man was a medic and checked out their scrapes and bruises, they had come in contact with a few plants that gave them little white bumps, but he said they were ok. They kept asking me if I was ok, I think I was nearly ready to collapse from exhausted, but there was no way I was letting them wait any longer, I wanted to get back to John so he would know everyone was ok.   He gave them coats and flashlights, offered water and food, and then we headed back again.  Benjamin ended up with a crew behind me and I didn't want to be separated.   I told Glen I was going back for Benjamin.  I told them all that he was afraid of strangers and I wanted to be near him, but really I was still feeling anxious and wanted to reassure myself that he was ok.  I put him back on my back and refused all offered from the rescue volunteers to take him from me until we were in sight of John and I put him down to hug daddy.
ok, so why did I tell you all this?  Two reasons, first I felt like Heavenly Father had blessed us so much!  It could have turned out very differently, but I know he was looking out for us.  First of all, my friend was there.  Without her it would have been so much more stressful and hard.  She ran ahead on the trail asking everyone she met if they had seem two boys.  Then there were the teens who found them.  My friend met them near the beginning of the trail and they said no, they hadn't seen two boys and then everyone went their way, but one guy turned back and got her number so that they could call if they happened to see our kids. Turns out they were the ones who found Glen and Benjamin and they were able to call.  There was my ability to run nearly two miles to met my kids.  There were so many times when I was so exhausted that I thought I'd collapse, and then I would get a burst of strength so I could keep running.  There was the fact that my friend could receive the call when she didn't have any cell reception.  The peace that kept me from becoming hysterical.  My kids were safe, they knew how to get back to the waterfall and get help.  I'm so grateful for all of the miracles and tender mercies of the lord through this whole experience.
The second reason is to warn others.  We had talked many times about staying close.  Both boys said they understood the reasons for staying close.  There were three adults all keeping an eye on those two boys and they still ended up lost.  Next time we will make sure we take our emergency whistles, they could have been heard above the roar of the waterfall.  Next time, I'm sure that they will stay close though.  I wasn't they only one scared and I think that, more then the pinky promise made to the search and rescue team will keep Glen and Benjamin close to us on future hikes.
This is running long, but before I go I have to share one more thing.  Glen and Benjamin told us later that they had prayed many times when they were lost and scared.  They said that when they prayed a voice spoke to them four times.  The first three times they could not understand, they said the the voice spoke in another language.  The fourth time they understood.  They were told to follow the path to the river and then follow the river tot he water fall.  It was there that they found help.  What a special experience.  It reminds me of when the Nephites heard a voice from heaven and they couldn't understand it at first.  It spoke again, and then again and they finally understood it.


Tuesday, May 24, 2016

The D word

It's a nasty, yucky word, full of icky-ness.  Divorce.  The word alone breaks my heart. Makes me feel sick to my stomach.  Before I got married it was not even an option, as newlyweds, it wasn't even an option.  Whoa! Maybe I should pause to reassure you, I'm not breaking any sort of news here on the blog. Feeling better now? Good. Now back to my musings.
Boy meets girl, they fall in love, happily ever after, isn't that how the story goes?  Nope.  Not at all.  See, what the fairy tale fails to mention is that the happy, giddy, butterfly feeling won't last very long and when it's gone, what's next?  No one told me what to do, no one even warned me it would happen.  Lets go back about 8 years.  I had been married about a year and I realized that I wasn't in love any more.  how did that happen?  When did that happen?  John was a great guy and I enjoyed spending time with him, but I just didn't love him any more.  I didn't believe in the D word, I wouldn't even let myself think it.  Instead I faced years stuck in a marriage with a man I felt nothing for any more.  Ouch!  That was a long, ugly road I also didn't want to go down, so what was I going to do?  I remember sitting in the temple pleading for guidance.  What should I do?  I didn't love my husband any more, but I wasn't even thinking about that other, yucky word.  A voice whispered to get out while I still could. Yep, I'll ignore that one.  So I kept praying and it was like Jesus came and sat on the couch next to me so we could have a talk.
"Who is the first person you want to talk to when you leave the temple?"
"John!"
"Who do you want to talk to about your day?"
"John."
"Who do you love to sit with, laugh with, and read with?"
"John."
"Who do you feel the safest with?"
"John."
I'm noticing a pattern.  And then I was ready for the sweetest part.  I realized that I did love John, but you knew that already didn't you?  You already know how this story ends, so let me fill in the middle.  I realized that when you first meet someone and fall in love it's full of excitement and newness, it's full of butterflies and stolen kisses. And then you get married and back to regular life. You get busy with work and maybe kids.  You fall into a routine, comfortable with each other.  Maybe you miss it, I did.  You both change, the way you feel changes.  My love for John was still there, but it had changed to something different, something more solid, deeper, more enduring.  It will always be there.  Even when I am being buried in dirty laundry and diapers.  When life is so hectic I hardly get to see him all week and we miss our date because of one reason or another it's still there, running deep, like underground water.  A life spring that might be missed if you don't know what to look for.
Now here we are almost 9 years later and I gotta tell you, life has gotten tough.  It's busy and hectic, stressful, but still amazing because it's our life.  But sometimes in the hectic day to day I start to hear that voice again, the one trying to convince me we aren't in love any more and I have to look deep inside to find the deep abiding love.  But its still there, it's always there.  It will always be there, but I have to work to keep it.







Thursday, May 12, 2016

Home school again

Hi, I'm a home school mom.  If you know me, you know I talk about it a lot. I mean, A LOT!  I'm not trying to tell you that you should home school just because I do, but can you blame me?  It's my life.  All day long.  Every weekend.  Every holiday.  Home school is always on my mind. Maybe it's because I'm so passionate about learning, maybe it's because we go to school 12 hours a day. Every day.  Yep, you heard me.  12.  Hours.  We go to the school of life so every day is a school day and everything we experience is a lesson.  Sometimes we are sitting at our table to learn, but usually we are playing, and experimenting, and reading.  Shall we get to the point?  Good.
Summer is nearly upon us.  When school gets out for three glorious months.  Seems like a waste of three perfectly good months to me.  I mean we have the Olympics this year, super fun!  How about the 4th of July?  Who can miss out on a great lesson about the founding fathers, the constitution, and the revolutionary war?  The way I see it there are way too many good things to miss out on to take the summer off.  Cooking lessons, and typing, Algebra with Daddy, and the sewing lessons they have been begging for.  What about some good old science as we go rock hounding and hiking?  Vacations can be some of the most fun lessons all year.  Remember when I said I think about home school all the time?  Yep.  Seriously.  I was thinking about this months ago.  I could see summer looming and I could just hear the boys saying "But none of my friends are in school during the summer."  So I nipped it in the bud back in early April.  I told them we have school every day, did I tell you about the physics lesson that Sunday at the park?  I have been getting really excited for summer school as we will call it and so are they. They are looking forward to some out of the ordinary lessons,like sewing, and they don't feel like they are missing out.  They will still have TONS of time to play, but those super hot afternoon hours will not be wasted with movies and video games!  This is going to be a great summer!

Monday, May 9, 2016

I know the scriptures are true!

Did you know that the calcium in milk is really good for your bones, but make sure to drink low fat because fat is bad for you.  No way, milk is the reason for osteoporosis, it leeches the calcium from your bones and by the way fat is really good for you.  Ok, but I know you should start feeding babies solid food at four months, make sure to use rice cereal.  No!  You should let them exclusively nurse until they are 6 months at which point you should introduce them to real foods not processed junk.  But what if I can't nurse my babies?  Then use formula, no use goat milk it more closely simulates your milk.  If you don't exercise for at least 15 minutes at a time then it doesn't do you any good.  It does too, any physical activity is good for you.  Sun screen helps prevent skin cancer.  Sun screen prevents our bodies from developing a natural defense against the sun, making us more prone to sun burns.  You have to immunize to avoid deadly diseases. No way, immunizations cause autism and they have mercury in them, that's poison.  You shouldn't brush with fluoride, it's a poison and banned in Switzerland.  Fluoride helps prevent cavities, it's good for you.
Noticing a pattern?
I love to learn!  I love learning so much that whenever I find something interesting I research it.  However I have discovered that the internet is a HUGE source of information, so huge in fact, that you can find a reputable source to back up any opinion or idea you have.  In a world so saturated with information, often contradicting, sometimes I feel like I'll drown.  How can I know what is right?  How can I know what is true? In a generation of Google how can I know?
I know the scriptures are true!  I know that I can always find answers in the scriptures and that that information will never contradict itself.  I also know that the spirit testifies of the truthfulness of all things, even of the truthfulness of diets and immunizations.  With the spirit of God I can discern between truth and error, I can separate fact from fiction.   I am grateful that in such an overwhelming world of information I can always turn to the scriptures, to the Lord, and to personal revelation for guidance.

Friday, May 6, 2016

Beautiful day



  One day John pointed out something he has noticed about my prayers.  He said every time I prayed I said "Thank you for this day" and asked if it was repetitive or sincere.  I replied very seriously that I was sincere.  "Even on days that you tell me are terrible?"  Yes, even terrible days are days I am thankful for.  Here is why: I learn something every day.  Yesterday was a pretty crummy day.  I spent the entire day getting ready for a party, cooking food and cleaning the house.  What I wanted to do though, was play with my kids and read with them and cuddle and wrestle.  I was grumpy and irritable, impatient and at times even unkind.  It was one of the worst days.  Glen said it was worth it to have a party, but I think he is the only one who thinks so.  Benjamin said it was so not worth it and Elizabeth, well, I think too often she gets less mommy time then the boys.  Anyway, at the end of the day as I prayed I did say thank you.  I said it was a terrible day, but I was grateful because I had learned that spending time with my kids is so much more important then having the perfect party, a super clean house, and themed snacks.  I bet they would be just as happy with a bowl of popcorn and a movie. 
Because of yesterday I wanted to spend extra time with my kids.  After school we went to the park together for a little bit until lunch.  While eating it started to rain and we all went out to enjoy the storm.  We danced and jumped in puddles, drew with chalk and ran from pelting hail.  Benjamin and Elizabeth were fascinated by the storm drain and Elizabeth gathered hail.  As I watched them play in the rain I could almost see them learning and absorbing information from their world.  It was wonderful to watch.