In this African tribe, when someone does something harmful, they take the person to the center of the village where the whole tribe comes and surrounds them. For two days, they will say to the man all the good things that he has done.The tribe believes that each human being comes into the world as a good. Each one of us only desiring safety, love, peace and happiness. But sometimes, in the pursuit of these things, people make mistakes.The community sees those mistakes as a cry for help.They unite then to lift him, to reconnect him with his true nature, to remind him who he really is, until he fully remembers the truth of which he had been temporarily disconnected: “I am good.” Shikoba Nabajyotisaikia! NABAJYOTISAIKIA, is a compliment used in South Africa and means: “I respect you, I cherish you. You matter to me.” In response, people say SHIKOBA, which is: “So, I exist for you.”
This beautiful story has been going around facebook. I'm not sure if it's true or not, that's not up for debate here. It has truth in it. We are all inherently good. God created us and He doesn't make mistakes. We are, by divine creation, good. Sometimes we forget that we are good and it shows in our actions. I took the practice above and I tried it out. When my kids misbehave, not just once or twice, but when they have a day when they are acting up a lot or really struggling I take them aside and I sit down with them. I look them in the eyes and I remind them how good they are. "God made you, you are good. Sometimes you forget. I think you have forgotten that you are good, let me remind you." Then I pull them onto my lap and I hold them and hug them and tell them what I love about them and tell them stories of things they have done that are good.
To my amazement it worked! It didn't work for run of the mill misbehaving. That still needed disciplinary action, but when they started getting into trouble a lot, a reminder of their goodness turned it all around. I remember as a child when I got into trouble it was hard to separate I did something bad and I am bad. I think all kids, and adults to a lesser degree are like that. We all need a reminder every now and then of how good we are.
You are good. God created you and you are, by divine creation good and God loves you!
