Thanksgiving

 This is our first big holiday away from our family.  I thought it would be lonely all by ourselves for Thanksgiving.  We did really miss our family and all of the fun that is cousin time and family time, but this was a great Thanksgiving anyway.   We ate at noon so the girls could still have their nap on time and so I spent the morning cooking and preparing everything while John played with the kids.  At the end we all worked as a team to put our feast together.  Other then the kids getting a little grumpy right before everything went beautifully.  After we ate and cleaned up the girls lay down for nap and we spent the next few hours wrestling and playing computer games and card games.  We ate pie while we played card games and someone coined the phrase "Because it's Thanksgiving" and for the next few hours that was the reason for everything we did.  :)  When it got dark we drove around to look at the local John Deer light display, it's really cool and has a lot of fun things like the abominable snow man putting the star up, you know the one from the old Christmas movie.  There is also a Snoppy, Noah's ark, and hockey players on the pod. Overall we all really had a great time relaxing and enjoying each others Company.  It was nice to just do whatever we wanted.

We have so much to be grateful for this year and as we ate we all took turns talking about what we are grateful for.  We did the same when John introduced the Thanksgiving pancake tradition.

The family is of God

"God gave us families to help us become what he wants us to be.  This is how He shows His love, for the family is of God."  That cute little primary song has been running through my head most of the day.  I wanted to share a few small moments of inspiration that John and I have had that have had big results.
A month or so ago I had a few dreams and in them some force or another was trying to tear my family apart and no matter how hard I tried to hold tight to everyone my family was being ripped apart.  I woke up scared because I had that feeling that I get when I know the Lord is trying to speak to me, those weren't ordinary dreams and I need to listen or I might lose my family.  I talked to John and told him about my dreams and together we prayed to find out how to save our family and get us through whatever was going to try to tear us apart.  Our answer was simple to hear, but has been hard to do some times.  The answer was to spend more time together.  That was not the only time we received that answer either, it has come again and again from old conference talks we listened to "Too often mother and father are too tired to spend an hour reading with their children at the end of the day." From the Mormom channel "Wholesome recreation activities are as important to families as repentance, forgiveness and love."  from prayers to know how to help an angry boy who struggled "Spend more time with him."  Everywhere we turn it is the same answer, simple, right?  It has been hard to institute this though.  We like our own time, especially at night when we are both so tired, but we have tried.  I have to tell you , the difference in our family is AMAZING!  We have a much stronger bond then we did just 3 months ago.  Glen and Benjamin now look to us and each other for friendship.  Spending more time together working and playing has given us more time to talk about what is going on at school and home, it has given us opportunities to support each other in our individual struggles and ti find ways to serve each other.  We work more cohesively as a family.  The other day Glen prayed and thanked heavenly father for such a fun family and then later told me that he feels peaceful in our home.  I just about cheered out loud at hear that.  It means what we are doing is working.  Every time they come to us with their concerns, to ask to play with us, to talk to us, to hug us we are strengthening our relationship and bonding ourselves together so tightly that nothing will ever tear us apart.  Friends come and go, but family is forever.  How grateful I am for a loving Father in Heaven who has shown me how to save my family.

Peace

Ya know that feeling you get when you know your doing something right?  Something hard, but most definitely right?  I have had that all yesterday and all today.  It's a wonderful feeling of peace and joy.  I love this feeling, I love knowing that I am doing what is right even when it's hard, get to the point, right?  OK.
I have mostly stopped doing Mary Kay.  It's not because it was hard, hard work never stopped me from doing anything, although a good book sure has.  :)  It wasn't about the company or anything.  It just wasn't right any more.  Fore a few months I felt like it was right, and then I started to feel like something wasn't right.  I wouldn't figure it out.  I wasn't having success no matter how hard I tried, I just kept feeling like something was wrong.  I figured it was me, I must have been doing something wrong.  I had so many blessings and tried so hard to figure out what I was doing wrong.  Every day the feeling of wrongness became stronger, I just couldn't stand it.  I told John I didn't want to do Mary Kay any more.  I stayed up late praying, thinking, and reading scriptures, searching for answers.  I can across a saying I have on my fridge it says "There is joy in creating a home where faith can find a firm footing."  How that tormented me.  I couldn't do that.  I was to stressed, I didn't have the time to clean, to teach my kids, I had stopped going to the gym and felt sick all the time, I didn't make healthy meals very often because I didn't have time.  I missed that.  I missed the mundane day after dayness of being a stay at home mom.  I missed washing the same dishes, picking up the same toys, going over the alphabet 3 times to a kid who just isn't getting it.  I missed the time when my biggest worry was finding a new park, a new hike, teaching Glen a new word, helping Benjamin learn to stop hitting.  I missed my cheerful helpful kids, my happy husband.  My mood, my stress, and business had affected them all and I hated it.  I hated seeing what my absence was doing to my family.  I knew what I needed to do, I needed to stop working.  It wasn't like I worked 9-5, but I was gone, I was busy, I was stressed and even when I was home I couldn't just *be* home.  I needed to stop.  I prayed and fasted with John, I spoke with my bishop and we decided that it was right for me to stop.  I feel how right it is.  My kids need me FAR more then they need the little bit of extra money I was bringing in.  They had been passed from one teenager baby sitter to the next, one tv show to the next.  They had heard "I'm busy" so many times and they hated ti, I could tell.  They felt like I had no time for them, and I didn't.  That is gone now, I had realized how important being a stay at home mom is and not just saying I stay at home, but actually being there with my kids, in the moment so I could take the time to teach them and guide them.
I'm not saying Mary Kay is a bad company.  I think Mary Kay Ash truly was inspired by God to start this company and I still want to be a part of it.  I am still going to sell to my customers and family, but I won't be giving facials any more.  I think if I was willing to spend the 15 hours they say it takes to be successful that I would have been, I was VERY successful for a bit, but I am not willing to sacrifice my kids for success, not ever.  No success can make up for failure in the home.  Maybe some day when my kids are all in school for most of the day I will go back to it, but for now I am content to stay home and give them all of the time and attention they need.  I see so clearly how important that is.  If it meas scraping by for the rest of our lives then so be it, at least my kids will feel that they had a mother who loved them and made sacrifices for them ,but did not sacrifice them.

Holidays

I love holidays.  All holidays, especially the small ones.  Yesterday was Dr. Suess day, unless you teach school of have a child in school, I bet you didn't know that.  Dr. Suess day is one of my favorite days though.  Every year we have green eggs and ham, and this year we added in some thing one and thing two cupcakes.

I guess the reason I like the small holidays so much is that I like any excuse to bake and do fun stuff with my kids.  And I really like making food fun.  The other day I made a cake for dinner.  I made the meat loaf in two round cake pans and frosted it in mashed potatoes.  The kids were so excited that we were having cake for dinner, and they loved how fun it was even when it turned out to be real food and not chocolate cake.

So anyway, Dr. Suess day was a lot of fun, we had green eggs and ham for dinner, we made thing cupcakes together, and we read Dr. Suess books all day long.  It was a lot of fun to take some of the cupcakes to our friends too.  They didn't know it was Dr. Suess day... their kids did though.  :)  I must be a kid still.  Now I am looking forward to Pi day.  Should I make a square pie?
I hope that my kids look back on all my silly little holiday traditions with fondness.  I hope that the heart shaped pancakes, thing cupcakes, meat loaf cakes, and candles in all their food on birthday are good memories for them.

Mom and Dad

This is my Mom and Dad. Don't they look happy? This was a picture taken at my house over a year ago on their first date in 30 years. Here is the long story made short. They dated in high school, fell in love and wanted to get married, but because of family things they didn't. Then they lost contact. Around Christmas like 2 years ago they made contact on Facebook. I remember being there at my sisters house for Christmas, we were watching the Forgotten Carols, a family tradition, and mom was chatting on facebook the whole time. After she had been chatting for awhile, the giggling and blushing got my attention. I asked who she was chatting with and she said it was a guy she knew from school. I immediately thought "If he is single she is gonna marry him." Sure enough, not long after that they went on their "first date" and then got married. I won't even go into the night of their date, that is a story for another time, but lets just say it's like she as 16 again and I had fun.

Well, my mom and dad are moving out of their current home into another and so I have been helping them pack and clean. Last night we stayed late trying to get as much done as possible before we all just died from exhaustion and then they took me out to dinner. As I followed them to the restraint I watched them in their car. I was listening to a romantic song in the car and at a stop light I saw then lean in and kiss. Gross did not even enter my mind. I just felt so happy. My mom has a had a rough life. She was a single mom and she worked really hard and made a lot of sacrifices to make ends meet and to raise three crazy kids. I am so glad that she has found such happiness, she deserves it and it's about time she is in heaven with the love of her life.

My one regret in all this is that it didn't happen sooner. I know the Lord has a hand in all things and I do not question His will nor His time, but I do wish they had met up earlier. It would have been nice for my mom to have a loving husband and to tell you the truth I really like having a dad. But I take comfort in knowing that they have an eternity to be together and be in love. I thank the Lord for His plan of happiness and that it is just that, a plan of happiness.

How Could I forget?

I'm not sure how I manage it, but somehow I frequently forget how blessed I am.Today my little reminder was an article by an Atheist woman talking about "Mormon mommy blogs" She said she read them because "...they help women like me envision a life in which marriage and motherhood could potentially be something other than a miserable, soul-destroying trap," But she wondered if life was really as good as we portrayed it. I say we because I am a Mormon Mommy blogger. To answer her question, yes, life can be and is that good, for me at least.

I can be honest and still tell you that there are days when I miss being single, when all I had to worry about was me and not a huge pile of bills, kids, meals, house work, finances and so on. But Most days, yes, most days I love my life. I have a good life. I have a wonderful husband who is patient, kind, loving and works really hard to provide for us. I have two sweet, rambunctious little boys who bring me more joy then I ever imagined possible, we have a home, and we have the gospel in our lives.

Yes, we have a wonderful life. I often forget how wonderful. Lets face it, being a mom is not easy, it is no walk in the park. Even on the easy days, like today, I am exhausted, losing patience with a two year old who wont go to bed, and wanting to escape into a good book. But I have so many blessing that I was reminded of in reading this article. Elder Eyring promised in conference once that any faithful couple who paid a full thithe would be blessed to find a way for the mother to stay at home. We took that blessing to heart and put it to the test. And believe me it has been tested. John goes to school full time and works part time. Most of the time we are scraping together at the end of the month, but somehow we always make it. We make sure to pay our tithing and somehow there is always money when we need it. More then that there has always been a box of clothes or toys handed down to us form a friend or neighbor right when we needed it. We have all that we need and so much of what we want I cannot complain.

I had one woman say to me that she is so glad she is past the newly wed with kids stage because it was so hard on she doesn't know how she survived. She told me she was sorry I was in that stage, my response to her? I love it. Life is good. It is all in the way you look at life. If you can be grateful foe what you have, enjoy the life as you live it then life will be good no matter what. On the other hand if you keep saying to yourself, I will be happy when...life will be easier when... then you will always put off being happy. I choose to be happy and love life. I choose to remember my blessing and be grateful for every day, and I choose to life life, whatever the Lord my toss my way.

New Christams Traditions

This year John and I started a few family traditions. I wanted to take an angel from the Angel tree to have the opportunity to help others, we were going to start this tradition next year, but somebody dropped a jar of money off on our doorstep that allowed us to start this year. This year we chose a little boy age 2 and went shopping. It is easier for me to shop for little boys since I have two myself. After a stop at kid to kid and Wal-mart we had gotten what this little boy needed and a few things he wanted. I felt good being able to serve another and I am grateful for the money that allowed us to do so.

This year I wanted to wrap gifts in newspaper to save a bit of money. That is how it started anyway. Glen had so much fun coloring the paper for the gifts that I want to do it again next year. I think this tradition will continue while my kids are small, and maybe longer. I want to get plain paper next year so the pictures are clearer. To tell the truth I had fun coloring the wrapping paper with Glen.

Merry Christmas (yes I still say Christmas)

Summer fun

Now that summer is coming to an end I am a little sad. We have had so much fun as a family, but especially Glen and me. We did so much this summer, I will try to pick the best to share. There are a lot, but it's mostly pictures.

Glen got his first haircut

We took a lot of walks. Glen loves to point to trees and walk Mo (Nemo) the dog upstairs.

We took some really silly family pictures John looked so goofy with his shirt suffed full of muscles

We did a lot of swimming, I had hoped to do more but it was enough.
(Glen loves to swim, especially when I don't make him wear a life jacket.)

We went to the 24th of July parade, it was Glen's first and he loved it, he had so much fun.

We went to the park quite a bit,

and visited the Museum of Natural History

Glen discovered dirt tastes gross.

Running through the sprinklers and playing with the hose is something Glen loves (water)

Up at East Canyon where we spent a week on vacation Glen got to play in a stream for the first time. Again water, he had a blast. We also went swimming a lot up there, hiked, played games, and I got bitten by a snake. It left cute little teeth marks in my finger.

we had a Twister tournament at East canyon

and the Twister Champ...Grandpa. But I get a rematch after the baby is born (he said I had an "unfair disadvantage,")

All in all the summer was great and we are already looking forward to next summer when we can do even more. And I'm trying to think of ways to cram all of what we still want to do into busy a schedule before it gets too cold.