I'm already there

 I remember as a teenager in counseling reading affirmation cards.  I thought they were the lamest thing ever, but some of them have stuck with me through the years.  One of them said "The bad times may outnumber the good, but the good outweighs the bad."
Today as we all sat singing songs to the girls before bed I thought to myself "You cannot have quality time without quantity time."  We were having a quality moment.  Another one happened today when an attempt to wash the mud off of Elizabeth's foot turned into all of the kids running through this mud puddle until they were all soaked and covered in muddy water.  And every single one of them was smiling and laughing about it, I was too.
I get down on myself because of the amount of time I spend sitting at the computer staring blankly at the screen because I am too exhausted to move and I just need a minute to zone out.  I kick myself because I can't decide whether I should do the dishes or read the kids a book and then feel guilty that the dishes win out despite the fact that we really do need to have clean dishes to eat on.  I focus so much on the scraped elbow and tired boy and maybe it was too long of a walk that I fail to remember that we just spent an hour together having fun.  The hassle of getting the kids to come inside for dinner often over shadows the soccer game we just played.
What was it I thought earlier tonight?  "You can't have quality time without quantity time."  The fact that I can list off quite a few times when we spent quality time together tells me that I am doing a good job.  I am doing enough for and with my kids.   Now if I can just remember that.  I am committing to remember.  I am going to stop being so hard on myself and refocus on all the good that I do.  I am going to stop being so busy trying to be a good mom that I forget I already am a good mom.