Rhythm

By the end of the day I will know how to spell rhythm, it's kind a of a weird word.

        It was a rough winter.  We all get sick a lot, which is really abnormal for us.  About a month ago I got sick again.  I don't know what it was, but it made my head hurt so bad I could hardly see, I was really knocked down.  It took me a week after that to recover, every time I did so much as get up to get a drink my head started hurting all over again. I was seriously starting to think I would never get better, but I did.  And then depression and anxiety reared it's ugly head.  I just couldn't catch a break and I was very stressed and overwhelmed.  We had just taken a week break from school when I got sick and had to kind of take another break.  One week turned into three and I still felt like I couldn't keep my head above water.  I finally felt like I just needed to get back to our daily routine. 
        The difference was amazing!  The constant battle over everything from chores to bedtime disappeared.  Even when I had a hard day it was easier because I knew what to expect and so did the kids.  I never wanted a schedule, I never wanted to be tied down to a specific set of events each day.  I wanted to be free and do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted to.  I see now that a rhythm and routine are so necessary for us.  We thrive when we have a routine. 
        It makes it very clear to me that true freedom does not come from lack of responsibilities or commitments, true freedom comes from knowing what those responsibilities and commitments are so they can be filled.  Keeping the commandments of God does not take away our freedom, it shows us clearly what path we need to walk to have freedom and to thrive in this life.  I'm not lost or confused, I'm also not following blindly.  I WANT to walk this path, I WANT to keep the commandments because I like knowing what to expect, I like feeling safe and I like knowing what I need to do each day.  I find joy in the rhythm of the gospel and the rhythm of my life.

Joseph

Yesterday I was reading an article about Mary, the mother of Jesus.  It was a really fantastic article in the January 2018 Ensign and perfect for Christmas Eve.  It talked about how faithful she was, chosen to be the mother of the Son of God.  Choice above all other women.  Millions revere her.  Then I got to thinking about Joseph. He is an unsung hero in my eyes.  I think we do him, and ourselves a disservice when he is left out of the conversation.  We know Joseph was a righteous man. The scriptures say he was going to put Mary away privately, so he was compassionate.  Then the angel came and he married her instead. When Herod sent soldiers to kill all of the babies Joseph knew and fled to Egypt.  The angel came to him instead of Mary, that speaks of his sensitivity to the spirit and his willingness to obey.  I think Joseph was choice above men to be called as the Father of the son of God.  Sometimes people like to make the distinction very clear, he was not the Father, he was the step father.  Maybe it's the influence of growing up without a dad in my home, but I see Joseph as the father of Jesus as much as Mary is His mother.  I think Jesus saw Joseph as his father.
     Joseph must have taught him.  He taught Jesus to work with his hands, to be compassionate, to pray.  Joseph taught Jesus, by his example, how to be a good man and care for others.  I wish there were more in the scriptures about Joseph.  I don't wonder if he was a disciple, I believe he was, I know he was!  Did he live to see the great atoning sacrifice of our Savior?  Did a sword pierce his soul at the death of his son?  Or did he wait on the other side to see him again?
   

To my daughter

   
      My dearest daughter,
     You are beautiful.  You are strong.  You can be both at the same time.  I hope you never let anyone convince you that you have to stop wearing skirts and dancing to be strong.  There is strength in your femininity.  There is strength in your service and love.  There is strength in your sweet, kind heart.  You do not have to be tough to be strong.  You do not have to be harsh to be strong.  You can love ruffles and flowers and be strong.  You can love fire trucks and climbing trees and be strong. You can be you and love all of those things and  be strong.  You can love God and be strong.  There is more strength in knowing who you are and being that person, then there is in conforming to the ideas of another.  Your greatest strength will come from knowing that you are a child of God, a divine creation with limitless potential.  So go ahead and wear a dress every day.  Let pink be your favorite color. Keep loving fire trucks and science and math and singing and dancing all at the same time.  Keep being the amazing daughter of God that you were created to be.  Be you.  Be strong.  And remember, when you are weak, He will carry you and make your weakness become strengths.